What Makes Life Wonderful
Last night I watched the holiday classic, “It’s a Wonderful Life.”
It’s a tradition. I watch it every year. I feel like I know the movie forward and back. But this year I heard George Bailey say something I hadn’t heard in quite the same way before.
He held Mary by the shoulders and looked her square in the eye, resisting the love he felt for her and the inevitable sacrifices he knew he was going to make for his brother and their family business, and exclaimed, “I want to do what I want to do!”
He said it emphatically. It was a protest and a plea. It was a demand for recognition.
“It’s my turn!”
“I deserve this!”
“What about me?”
If you’ve seen the movie, you know that George continues to selflessly run the Building and Loan. He marries the girl and they restore the old Granville House, where they raise four kids. He helps his customers move into modest homes and build new businesses, and all around him, a community prospers through his selfless dedication, while he manages to just stay afloat.
Each time George has an opportunity to pursue his own dreams, circumstances conspire to give him the choice - do what you want for yourself or do what is right for the highest good.
Later when he finds himself at his darkest moment, when everything feels lost and hopeless, he’s overcome with his own bitterness. What was all the sacrifice for? He is out of options and the people he loves the most are going to suffer. He can’t save them.
And that is when he bows his head and prays, “Show me the way.”
For all the years I’ve watched “It’s a Wonderful Life,” I’ve never connected these two moments as the internal debate that they are. For all of us.
I want to do what I want! Show me the way. I want to do what I want! Show me the way.
Ego. Surrender. Ego. Surrender. Ego. Surrender.
I won’t give the entire movie away. Suffice it to say that in his surrender, George finds out how much he means to people and what they mean to him.
Life itself calls us to service and hard choices and we aren’t always ready and willing to listen. If you’re feeling depleted or unappreciated, I want you to remember that clinging to the idea of what you want, while going through the motions of taking care of others, will most assuredly deplete you. Asking for help and leaning into the emotional value of what you give to others, changes everything.
And if you’re feeling overwhelmed by the doingness of giving and gifting this holiday season, I encourage you to pause it all and watch “It’s a Wonderful Life.” Because, you know, it really is.
With respect and appreciation for the ways you honor this time of year, blessings and love,
Kathleen
